You might agree that most women share the basic desire to be loved, although in some cases there exists a blurred line between feeling cherished or controlled. At first, your husband’s attention may seem sweet. But over time, his actions could become intimidating or scary – especially if he tries to dictate where you can go, who you can talk to and what you can do.

Hopefully, you and your spouse can openly discuss your concerns. However, regardless of what he says, there are some signs that he may not be respecting you and your wishes.

Three signs of a potentially-abusive marriage

Whether you and your husband are considering divorce or trying to make your marriage work, your spouse’s obsession with you might go too far. And at some point, you may need to involve law enforcement in your relationship.

You would be wise to call for help if your husband’s actions scare or intimidate you. While taking this step may make you uncomfortable, it could protect you in the future.

Some negative, controlling behaviors might include:

  • Digitally tracking you. An obsessive spouse may install spyware on your electronic devices to monitor your communication or use a standard location tracker in your vehicle to track your whereabouts.
  • Dropping by. You might welcome and appreciate some surprise visits. However, when your husband randomly visits you at work or appears during a girl’s night out, you might wonder why he feels the need to keep an eye on you, or at what point he will lose trust in you altogether.
  • Damaging your property. A controlling partner might take drastic measures to keep you from involvement with others. For example, breaking your phone or slashing the tires on your car are unhealthy ways to try to dominate you. Keep in mind that if your husband has no boundary against physically hurting your personal items, he might hurt you.

A healthy, loving relationship involves trust and openness, so if your husband’s behaviors turn from lovingkindness to those of obsession or control, you might want to establish an exit strategy. And if you cannot predict how your spouse will respond if you file for divorce, it might be best to take the necessary steps to protect yourself, and your assets, before you make your intentions known.